The Perfect Life Lesson

Living by example is the most powerful way to teach and learn.  My mealtime chant is, “Sit down at the table.  Did you ask to be excused?” But then five minutes later I catch myself standing at the kitchen sink washing a pot instead of sitting at the table and talking with my boys.  My constant chant throughout the day is, “You need to speak calmly in a big boy voice to let me know what you need” while my voice is elevated to rock concert decibels and smoke is coming out of my ears.  Don’t even get me started on what I say about electronics versus my smartphone habits!  I’m not a total failure in the setting-a-good-example department.  I rarely drop my pants at the park to relieve myself, and though I may want to, I never strangle my children.  Despite the good example I set in these areas, my children still struggle!?  Teaching by example…..it’s the most important, but biggest challenge of parenthood. 

I received a teach-by-example lesson of my own at my Grandpa Whattoff’s funeral.  Grandpa lived a wonderful life and loved God.  The funeral was the joy-filled celebration that I was expecting.  But it surprised me by also being filled with life lessons.  Even in death, Grandpa was able to make a powerful impact because of the way he chose to live his life.  Grandpa was a grace-filled man.  I never heard him speak in judgement of another person.  He was the patriarch of a large family, with its share of troubles and troublemakers.  Those who would be considered black sheep in another family were just considered beloved members of his family.  Even the breaking of laws and serving of jail sentences didn’t break his love.  Grandpa had ALL of his grandsons as pallbearers; his ex-convict grandsons, his step-grandsons that let too many years pass since visiting.  Even in death he extended unconditional love by extending this great honor to each of them.  I think Grandpa saw in each of them the wonderful men that God created them to be.   

Witnessing my Grandpa’s unconditional love made me think of God’s unconditional love.  He has a grand plan.  Despite our mistakes, He loves us and wants each of us to be part of this perfect plan.  Like Grandpa, God extends unconditional love and honor to even the lowest in society.  His plan included using a prostitute (Rahab) to defeat the city of Jericho, and rewarded her faith by including her in the lineage of Jesus. 

Given my Grandpa’s and God’s ability to show grace and love, I’m embarrassed and convicted that I struggle so in this area.  I pass judgement too often and too quickly.  I hold on to the wrongs committed against me.  And in doing so, I unwittingly pass this bad habit on to my children.  I want to be a better parent and set a better example.  Wouldn’t it be great if my kids didn’t pee in public, didn’t strangle each other AND extended grace to others?  That would put me in the Mommy Hall of Fame for sureJ.