How do I love thee? Let me count the ways....

Dear Son,

You came home from Kindergarten today and shared that other kids had fruit snacks for their snack.  The way you said this implied that I don’t love you as much as those mommies.  And I may have made a retaliatory type of reply in saying that their mommies don’t love them since fruit snacks are filled with sugar and chemicals.  I realize now that this reply was harsh.  Those kids’ mommies love them just like I love you.  But moms tend to show love in different ways.  So here are the ways that I like to show you I love you:

1.  Cooking healthy, homemade food--fruit snacks are only a hiking/skiing bribe in this 

     house buddy

2.  Not letting you wear holey jeans in public, or that Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle 

     t-shirt with the hole in it

3.  Reading you 327 books a day (not really, but almost)

4.  Making you do flashcards to learn the sounds letters make, pure torture for all 

     parties involved. 

5.  Taking you to McDonald’s on occasion—no child should live without
     cheeseburgers and a playplace.

6.  Rubbing your back before bed

7.  Digging through the Lego bin to find that one critical piece for your Lego storm 

     trooper ship

8.  Not letting you pick your nose

9.  Teaching you to clean the toilet (although that’s really for your future wife)

10. Screaming, “FIRETRUCK” whenever and wherever we see one

So although I won’t be packing fruit snacks in your backpack anytime soon, you can rest assured that I will tirelessly show my love for you by performing the ten acts above and countless others.  I love you that much and more!  And if you negotiate really hard, I’m sure we could reach amicable terms for taking fruit snacks to school…..like the last day of school…..of your senior year:-)

Choosing life-giving words...

The power of words can be extraordinary.  Through my teenage years, it was the negative aspect of this statement that I mostly experienced (both on the giving and receiving end).  Now that I’m in the trenches of motherhood, and surrounded by equally desperate women, I find myself handing out and receiving the positive power of words.  

Thursday was just another day.  We walked to our neighborhood park, our daily cure for the post-nap grouchies.  Another mom on the playground asked if I had been in a particular kids’ music class a couple of years earlier.  When I shared that I had been in that class, she went on to tell me that I had been an inspiration to her.  She was pregnant with her second, and feeling overwhelmed at the thought of having two kids.  Seeing me drag my two one-year-olds and three-year-old to the class, and mostly enjoy it had given her hope of surviving and even thriving with two kids.  I had unknowingly helped her two years ago, and she chose to give me a booster shot to the soul that day with her words. 

Just a few hours later, I found myself at a moms’ night out giving what I hope was a booster shot to a mom struggling with a strong-willed child and questioning her mothering abilities altogether.  Showering her with encouraging words of how I saw her as a strong woman and mother helped to lift her out of the pits of self-doubt (and the wine didn’t hurt either!)

I love how The Message Bible translates Proverbs 18:21, “Words kill, words give life; they’re either poison or fruit—you choose.”  We get to choose how we use our words, and it brings such joy to experience words that give life.  May I remember to bring that joy to my children, husband, and even the grouchy old man at the gym by choosing the words that bring life.

When you’re the mommy that doesn’t send a snack

Oh my is this the longest week ever!  I’m one of those change addicts that loves the idea of change, but hates the reality of it.  The inauguration into elementary school has been PAINFUL.  I nearly broke down in tears today when the horse folder (don’t ask me…I don’t know either) didn’t make it into Kenny’s backpack.  The sacred horse folder is apparently the keeper of all important paperwork coming home.  And today that meant the forms for school pictures.  My child has already been the ONE to not wear the school shirt to the first day of school (his choice).  The ONE to not have a snack on the first two days of school (my lack of knowledge).  Now he’s on the brink of being shutout of the iconic school picture!  WHAT IS GOING ON?   I used to be a smart woman.  I just read my engineering resume from six years ago and couldn’t decipher half the words.  Is my brain turning to mush?  Do I need more coffee?  More sleep?  More time away from preschool books/kids shows/made-up superhero games?  (See how much I hate the reality of change and how it induces a complete meltdown?)

After putting my head between my legs and breathing deeply for a few minutes, my cognitive processing abilities returned and I was reminded of something.  God is constant.  Psalm 48:14 says, “…this God is our God forever and ever; he will be our guide even to the end.”  What a wonderful truth.  He has been constant in my life through successful career days, a joyous wedding day, the mania of post-partum days, the terror-filled days of my spouse’s illness, and yes, even the first days of kindergarten.  He knows me and my tendency to overreact, and has surrounded me with a husband and friends who know how to talk me down from the edge of my imaginary cliff.  Yes, the possibilities are endless with God in my corner.  Who knows…maybe I could even be class mom one day? 

Our first awkward school moment....

This morning was Kenny’s first day of Kindergarten.  Let me restate that, this morning was the thirty minute “meet and greet” with Kenny’s kindergarten teacher and five other students in his class.  I’m new to this elementary school gig, but felt pretty confident that I could control the chaos of going anywhere with three boys for thirty minutes.  That confidence disappeared like a girl who shows up to a dance without a date.  We didn’t so much as get into the doors of the school before one of the little brother’s (whose job was to blend in to the background) was stung by a bee.  We proceeded, through tears, to the classroom where every one of my three boys needed to use the bathroom (seriously….they have a weird fascination with public restrooms).  Then the other little brother sat down and started coloring a sheet designated for a student just before awkwardly running to another mommy and hugging her thigh.  I was counting on other parents bringing siblings, but it just so happened that our group was full of only children.  The teacher (24 and right out of college), and the other parents were looking at us like we were straight off the carnival train. 

Thankfully, I had carved out the time to do my morning devotion.  God never fails to give me the encouragement I need to face my day, and today I was reminded of the strength of God’s love for me.  According to Ephesians 3:18, His love is wide and long and high and deep.  His love is far longer than the awkward stares I received in the classroom, and wide enough to help me forget the less than perfect start of the school year.   Tomorrow is a new day, the highlight of which will be taking first day of school pictures with my oldest wearing a neon green school t-shirt (not exactly my vision when I brought him home from the hospital!)…..and will surely present me with the opportunity to soak up more of God’s love in an awkward situation.  These are the hidden blessings for mamas of three boys!