Thinking about Thanksgiving

What a Thanksgiving week!  Normally any holiday would find us in the car, trekking to spend time with family in the Midwest.  We stayed put this year, with my Mother-In-Law visiting from Michigan.  It was a great week, and wonderful Thanksgiving, filled with hiccups that will insure we remember the day for years to come.  The turkey, after three days in the fridge, was still frozen solid on Thanksgiving morning.  So instead of relaxing with a cup of coffee and the Macy's parade, we commenced "Operation Turkey Thaw".  We managed to thaw it enough to remove the innards and pop it in the oven by 9AM.  My husband, the great turkey cooker, pulled the turkey out a few hours later to check the progress only to spill half of the juice all over the oven and floor.  So the leisure time I planned for primping, perhaps even painting my nails was replaced with "Operation Turkey Grease Cleanup".  And that's when we decided to have a glass of wine!:-)

In addition to the memorable Thanksgiving day, we spent the week breaking bad habits and instilling good ones.  One of the boys sucks his fingers, and we received the threat of braces from the dentist.  Upon seeing their brother's reward pile, the other two quickly identified behaviors they needed to improve.  One boy resolved to stop picking his lip while the third set his sights on practicing his instruments without being reminded.  I made charts, we picked out more prizes, and then we hunkered down for the week.  

Each boy showed an amazing dedication to behavior modification, which meant a check mark on the chart each day.  Prizes were earned, praises were heaped, and just a few breakdowns were endured (turns out that sucking fingers provides a level of pleasure that only the most addicted drug addict could appreciate, and quitting cold turkey proved painful for everyone in the household!)  The difficulties were worth enduring because the end result was three boys that have been molded a little more into healthy humans.  It also gives me the opportunity to add a check mark to the I'm-A-Good-Mom chart, which I tirelessly track in my head.

An additional bonus for me (besides a few more gray hairs) has been a greater understanding of God as the potter for my life.  Isaiah 64:8 says, 

   "Yet you, Lord, are our Father.
    We are the clay, you are the potter;
    we are all the work of your hand.  

So just as I work as a parent to mold my children into productive members of society, God molds me into the perfectly unique versions of myself, made in His image.  He sees when a bit of clay needs to be removed, or a bit added to perfect my shape.  He knows when I need to rest.  His timing is perfect as he places me in the kiln to be exposed to heat and transformed into a stronger vessel.  He picks the perfect glaze to give me a color that will make the biggest impact on the world.

Its not my place, as the clay, to tell God what to do.  My job is to yield to his touch, to submit to his plans, and to have faith that the end result will be more magnificent than I could ever imagine.  

What a peace-filled promise to know that, unlike cooking a feast for Thanksgiving, we're not responsible for a perfect outcome.  We have God, the potter.  We can entrust ourselves to Him, knowing that the end-product will be beyond our wildest dreams.

Killing It

“I never expected to be a stay at home mom, but here I am killing it!”  

A friend gave me this plaque, which sits above my kitchen sinks. Most days, it serves as a comical joke at how short I am falling, but this week....I’m living up to my plaque potential!  

Yesterday was the second grade fieldtrip to the Nature and Science Museum—killed it!  Not only did I keep track of all five assigned kids, but we thoughtfully perused the museum, asked good questions of the dossiers, and even found the knolls hidden around the museum.  

Today was 4th grade’s poetry reading and the school’s Thanksgiving lunch—killed it!  Arrived on time for poetry reading, remembered to video my child, and followed teacher request to provide written feedback for two different students....check and check.  

Kenny’s scroll featuring his poem “Colorado”

Thanksgiving lunch was its own monster...two different lunchtimes, which I navigated without completely embarrassing my three boys.  I even ended up with a bonus boy.  (His Mom had a broken toe and was home with his older brother who had “thrown up last night...and the dog ate it!”  😳)

But I can feel my super powers waning.  We’re sitting at the dentist waiting room, where I am completely ignoring my children.  The Mom next to me is killing it, with cuddling and having meaningful conversation with her kids.  I want to lean over and whisper, “I’ve been killing it for the past two days!”  And we’re just minutes away from a dental cleaning, which is sure to include admonishments regarding parental brushing in children under the age of 8.

The truth is we all have our limits as humans.  Just when we think we have nailed it, we screw it all up.  Thank goodness our “killing it” at life isn’t a prerequisite to be loved by our Heavenly Father.  He is more perfect than the best mom out there, and loves even the worst mom out there.  So as I feel my super powers fade, I know His love for me doesn’t.  What a sweet  reassurance!  

So whether you’re killing it today, or giving a nasty side-eye to  the mom that is, you can take a breath and REST in His promise of Psalm 23:4 “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of fieldtrip chaperone, I will fear no second grader, because God is with me.”  (Mommy Translation). Feel free to make that verse your own.  Whether it’s a trip to Disney or a trip to the doctor.  Whether you’re killing it or feel like you’re being killed by it, God is with you!  What a relief!

Time Change Tantrums

It's time change week as well as the week after Halloween, so you can guess how things are going around here!  The boys were up shortly after 6AM yesterday, and by 7 a brother brawl of epic proportion had broken out.  I sent everyone back to their rooms to cool off while I pressed coffee and hunkered down for the day, pondering my former love of the fall turning of the clocks. 

Before I became a mother, fall time change was the bomb.  An extra hour to catch up on sleep after a night out was the immediate payoff.  The longer term bonus was getting an early morning workout in thanks to my internal clock's confusion.  Awaking at 5AM for a workout is not part of my genetic makeup, but for the precious few months following time change, I can hang with the most dedicated fitness fanatic. 

Fall time change has fallen from it's former status of one of the best days of the year to a day that I have to suffer through and recover from for weeks.  I just need to accept my new reality and look forward to springing forward and boys who sleep in for a change. 

The reality for every one of us is that God is constantly changing our season in life.  Parenting is the perfect example since we master one age's worth of activities, discipline and sleep schedules only for our child to outgrow what we've mastered and challenge us with figuring out a new set of activities, discipline and sleep schedules.  It's neverending! 

As frustrating as change may be at times, we can be assured that God always has a specific purpose in mind.  Isaiah 43:18-19 reveals how He views change, "Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past.  See, I am doing a new thing!  Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?"  God is reminding His people that He has changed their season from one of slavery in Egypt to one of freedom, and that He is in the process of changing their hearts to prepare them for the future, which is sure to be different from the past in the very best ways.

This reminder can serve as a comfort and promise to us as well.  Rather than dwelling on what we loved in our past and wanting to hold on to it, we are called to look and see the new thing God is doing in our lives!  The past and present is merely a preparation for our future.  So we can take comfort every time the clock changes and leaves life in disarray, knowing that the next season brings opportunities to discover God's plan for us.

From a parenting perspective, we wouldn't want children who didn't learn and grow and change.  That would send us straight to the pediatrician for a thorough evaluation.  We should have the same expectation for our own lives.  Our hearts and minds should be constantly changing and growing.  We should be looking forward to the new thing because with it, we know that God still has plans for us!